Based on an original insult by Malcolm Grant (P.E. teacher, Dover Boys Grammar School)

NEWish! Family Tree Updated 4th January 2003

Aha. The first steps towards this massive undertaking - logging my entire family tree online.

Remainder of 2001 piccies Updated 6th April 2003

Hardly worth the wait, but here they are anyway. Now includes V2001 and my 30th birthday.

Canada Revisited Updated 14th October 2001

Wow, we finally made it back to Canada. Olley and myself, that is - Dave was saving for his wedding so is excused the expense, not to mention the extra hassle of having to put up with AJ for a week. Anyway, there's not that much to share with you as the whole idea (mine at least) was to do as little as possible... but this is how we did it.

League of Gentlemen piccies Updated 29th May 2001

More pictures from my wide-ranging life. See me, Scotty, Foden and Mr Miller arsing about with TV's popular the League of Gentlemen!

Am I Hot Or Not? Updated 8th January 2001

I submitted my mug to the famed Internet Rogue's Gallery, and this is what the general public thought of me...

Tenerife Holiday Updated 29th December 2000

A handful of pictures which give you a fair idea what my recent week in Tenerife consisted of. In. Whatever.

My Birthday Updated 28th December 2000

I was fortunate enough to assemble a phalanx of my best friends to celebrate my 29th birthday back in November. To find out who they were, click above!

V2000 piccies Updated 3rd September 2000

Recently I went to V2000 with Barry, Vicky and Charlie. Great time had by all, etc. Anyway, just a handful of piccies as of yet - taken on one of the 25 crappy Orion Motor Insurance "Incident cameras" I was given when they sacked me. You woudn't believe how much work it took to make the one of all four or us look any good at all.

My Holiday in Canada, 1998 Updated 18th June 2000

We're going back over next spring, so to psyche myself up I thought I'd write up a belated report on our fondly-remembered (apart from the near-death experience on the motorway) 1998 trip. WARNING: Some of the photographs are of poor quality and not worth the download time.

Photo album Updated 3rd December 2000

Self-explanatory. Pictures of my mates in Dover and Canterbury, ex-workmates, ex-girlfriends, friends from 'uni' - oh, and family. Also various flattering and non-flattering pictures of myself.

My Writing Career Updated 23rd December 2000

Now that my writing career has finally mutated into a 'Writing' 'Career', thanks to the ineluctable Mr David Miller of Shivers magazine, I thought it would be worthwhile detailing the other gubbins I've produced, outside of this net we call inter.

My Acting Career Updated 27th February 2000

Just a couple of photographs so far, but I thought it was time to say something about my short-lived, but not entirely unsuccessful acting career (1987-89). Not to be confused with my later entirely unsuccessful acting career (1996) at the East Kent Local Group.

They got me working for the man  Updated 8th June 2000

If you're thinking of giving me a job, perhaps a look at my CV will convince you otherwise.

The SADder side of life Updated 28th November 1999

I edit a fanzine for cult tv fans - the Strange and Dedicated, as I call them. It's called SAD Magazine. It has its own website, but if you click on the orange lettering I will introduce you to the whole phenomenon in a painless way.

If music be the food of love - let's eat it Updated 5th December 1999

Music is one of my favourite things. Well, who can't say that?! Apart from Dave Lee Travis, Gary Barlow and the like. But maybe you'd like to see what I've been listening to recently, or find out my fave bands, albums and songs of all time?

Read on, MacDuff Updated 5th December 1999

Books and lit. are another of my favourite things. Here you can see what I've been reading recently, or find out my fave authors and novels of all time.

Language, Timothy Updated 14th November 1999

Rabbiting on about the less useful aspects of the English language is another of my favourite things. Join me in a spirited exploration of various points of grammar, punctuation and general anally retentive pedantry - or perhaps you're as bad as I am and would like to suggest a topic for discussion!

Now updated with some priceless advice from my colleague Nick "I admit it, I'm a doryphore" Flynn and his lovely lady wife.

Non-missing Links Updated 27th September 1999

Now reorganised into themed sections for easy access! Namely: Television and film; Yumour; Science-Fiction, Fantasy, Horror and That; My Chums; Music; and Miscellaneous. Now there's no excuse for not making this site your homepage - your one-stop link to the best the internet has to offer!!!

Thank you for the Muse (sic) Updated 1st August 1999

Credits, kind of. Also features links to, and pictures of, all my mates herein listed.

I love Maria Decolellis Updated 27th June 1999

Maria was my own personal recruitment consultant, and we were such a team as you wouldn't believe! Find out what kind of woman could turn my head in such a way, here!

Luckily, that's all I've done at the moment. You see, I do have one or two better things to do. Written proof of this is available on request.

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